Thursday, June 09, 2005

CPC branding problems

Sex and beer

We live in an age where the average Canadian voter is going to spend as much time examining the policy positions of the various political parties as Dan Rather spent fact checking some rather dubious reports about Dubya’s service records.

Ain’t. Gonna. Happen.

Instead, Canadians completely ignore all the finely-tuned policy documents and let the media define what each political party stands for through two second sound bites. The Bloc has stepped up to the plate and defined themselves. Quebec first. None of the other political parties has been nearly so savvy, carelessly letting Canada’s media pundits do this for them. Here is how each party seems to have been tagged so far…

Liberal Party of Canada: “Get free stuff.”
New Democratic Party: “Help the poor.”
Green Party: “Save the whales.”


There is one exception to the three syllable platform, and you have to tip your hat to the Conservatives for driving into this pothole with the same unerring accuracy that they’ve managed to hit every other pothole on Canada’s political highway.

Your insta-platform can’t be negative.

Negative platforms don’t work. And since Harper and crew seem to have some sort of quota system that prevents them from issuing useful sound bites to the media, the media – and the CBC in particular – have been happy to step in and define the CPC’s insta-platform instead. Depending on what news source you’re reading, here’s how you’ll see the Conservatives defined:

* Grits are thieves
* Old white men
* Rich white men
* We hate fags
* We don’t steal

It would certainly be hard for the Liberals to argue against sex and beer.